Wasting time

This is a meme thats on a lot of blogs (yes, I know I have too much time on my hands) and it truly blows.

Like I said I've seen about half a dozen of these, and I haven't finished any one of them. I get to number 6 and start to waiver by number 9 I have to skip straight to number 59 and then finish it. Seriously, people answer this honestly, and we wonder why the world is a fucked up place.

1] What is your middle name? Sue

2] What color is your mailbox? Is that a sexual question, is this a gay quiz, if it is apparently I'm a bear or something?

3] Are you available? Are you asking.

4] Have you ever hit a deer? No, one punch and he knocked me the fuck out.

5] Do you have to drive over a bridge to get home? No, I jump it Dukes of Hazzard style!

6] Do you get the paper delivered to your house in the morning? Nah just a paperboy

7] Who checks the mail in your house? The postman hopefully

8] Do you have a small driveway? A gentleman never tells.

9] Do you know anyone with the same ringtone as you? Its the Nokia tone so I don't think so

10] What do you do first in the morning? Pleasure myself.

11] What brand is your printer? See these questions suck, skip to the end save yourself now

12] Do you enjoy fighting with people? Just the elderly, when they go down they stay down.

13] Is your hair naturally straight or curly? Collars or cuffs?

14] Who was your kindergarten teacher? Arnold Schwarzennegger

15] Are you taller than your mother? Are you saying my mothers short or something

16] Do you have a favorite word? Antidisestablishmentarianism or fucktard

17] Are you God? No, but I'm affiliated to his friend Satan though

18] What do you do to get over a broken heart? Alcohol and porn.

19] Do you have a deep dark secret? I think I'm funny - I'm not (You can tell right)

20] Do you enjoy writing in colored pens? Only when I'm writing the ransom note

21] Does anything hurt on your body right now? Will you rub it better if I tell you it does

22] Do you often cry during a movie? No, I can't see the film properly if I do.

23] Do you hate your life? Just the person's who's come up with these questions.

24] Do you get mad easily? Only if I find the person from the pervious answer.

25] What is your biggest pet peeve? Have no pet peeve's just a pet labrador

26] What is your away message? Leave the money in a bag by the side of the road then drive away, don't look back, we'll be watching!

27] Do any of your friends have kids? I've told them to give them back but they won't

28] Who should pay on the first date? The guy, might as well get used to it from the start (I'm going to hell for that one - I'm hoping you'll have given up before you reach this one)

29] How many years older than you are you willing to date? Depends on how much money they have

30] Do you have any friends? Depends on how much money I have

31] Do you have any mean friends? What, like an average of all of them

32] What is the ugliest color in your opinion? Vomit

33] Have you ever liked someone who all your friends couldn’t stand? Yo momma

34] Have you ever felt like driving off a cliff? Cliff deserved everything he got

35] Do you itch your ears? Not on purpose, but I tend to scratch them if they itch, if that's what you mean you question setting moron, what a fuck knuckle this person is, jesus

36] What brand are the pant/jeans youre wearing right now? I'm naked

37] How tall are you? What erect or limp?

38] What is the closest green object? Fungus

39] What is on your feet? Skin, like everyone else's

40] Do you like watermelon? But only as a friend

41] Do you want to have kids? Yeah, ok, but you'll take them back when I'm bored right

42] What is the brightest color youre wearing? Do I answer pink or purple, you remember the naked bit right

43] Who is the friend you have that you would never have expected to have gotten to know? Jenna Jameson, we're getting married you know

44] Whats your mothers middle name? Laqisha

45] Stupidest movie you ever saw? Titanic - I laughed from beginning to end

46] Do you like your dad? No, yours is better

47] Do you have any TV shows on DVD? Does Rug Munchers 1-50 count if I just watch them on my TV

48] Are you wearing makeup? No, I really am this ugly

49]Do you have a tattoo? No, but I have someone else's

50] Do you know how to draw? My golf swing is more of a hook

51] Who is your hero? Anyone who'se watched all the Rug Munchers films, Ive only seen the best part of 40 of them

52] Who did you last IM? Dubya, but he's was busy

53] Do you work a lot of hours? I try not to work any

54] What do you do when you are stressed out? I pleasure myself

55] Who was the last person to call you? The hostage negotiators

56] Is there anything you regret? They stopped Rug Munchers at 50

57] Do you know where your family name originated from? If I tell you my name you'll curse me won't you

58] Is there an animal that creeps you out? Evertonians

59] What was the last thing you did for fun? Pleasure myself (repeatedly)

60] Last time you cried? When I realised they stopped Rug Munchers at 50, and had to switch to Clam Lappers instead

I'm sorry, that's all I can say.

p.s - if you were offended by any of the above answers - GOOD.
p.p.s - Now go away and read a momy blog instead.